The Joy of Disappointment

by J. Brown

My favorite sports team is the New York Knicks. The Knicks, for the lack of a better phrase, are not good. Over the past 10 years, they’ve made the NBA playoffs three times, twice losing in the first round. They’ve finished with a record above .500 only three times in the past 14 seasons. And Knicks fans older than me haven’t fared much better; their last championship was in 1973. As a fan, rooting for the Knicks has been a mixture of frustration, despair, apathy, false hopes and disappointment. 

It would be easy for an outsider to wonder why I cheer for a team that has given me so little to cheer for. The easy thing for me to do would be to drop them for a perennial winner (like the Spurs) or an exciting young team with newfound success (like the Warriors). To be honest, there have been seasons when the team was so bad that I flat out refused to watch them – I touched on that idea in a previous post. But I’ve been rooting for the Knicks since 1998. Over the past 18 seasons, they’ve become my team. At this point, it wouldn’t even feel right cheering for another team. I’m in too deep now. 

Moreover, I doubt that I would really be able to enjoy rooting for a team that was significantly better than the rest. One of the biggest reason we watch sports is for the mystery of the unknown. We’re intrigued by the idea that anything could happen. It becomes a lot less fulfilling to watch a team win when you already expected them to do so. 

When Being Right is Wrong

by J. Brown

As you all know by now, France was attacked by terrorists on Friday night. In an event that felt eerily similar to 9/11, 129 people were killed by attacks at six different French locations. ISIS has since claimed responsibility for the attacks, and it can be assumed that the attacks were due to France's involvement in the US airstrikes in Syria. (For more information on the Syrian war, check this out. I was a bit in the dark myself, and this video helped to clear up a lot for me.)

Since news of the French attacks surfaced in the US, many Americans have taken to social media to express their well-wishes and to show solidarity for the innocent lives that were lost. Others, after seeing these displays of sympathy, took to social media to explain why we should not be supporting the French. 

This makes no sense.

One argument is that we are extending a level of sympathy to France that was not given to Beirut, Lebanon, which experienced similarly devastating terrorist attacks, and that we routinely do not show enough support to other victims around the globe. This may be true, and in all honesty, it probably is. What I don't understand, though, is how any of that makes it wrong to show support to the French. Should we be talking about Lebanon and the other nations that have been devastated by terrorists? Absolutely. Does that mean we must now stop talking about France? No, not at all.

The (Alleged) Importance of Education

by J. Brown

During college, I took a number of courses on African-American History and Literature. In one such course, we discussed and wrote essays comparing and contrasting the views of Booker T. Washington and W.E.B. Du Bois. Both men were influential Black figures during the Reconstruction era that followed the abolition of slavery. After freedom was finally achieved, most former slaves found themselves in a very fragile state. Newly-freed Blacks now had to find places to live, find ways to make a living, and ultimately learn how to survive on their own. As one might imagine, this led to various opinions on how best to achieve these newfound goals. While many African-Americans held polarizing views, Du Bois and Washington served as figureheads representing the opposite ends of the spectrum. 

Du Bois, who was born free, was well educated and graduated from Harvard. He believed that the key to Black success would come from education, knowledge of the arts, and access to equal opportunities. Washington, who was born a slave, graduated from Hampton, a historically black college. He founded Tuskegee Institute, which focused on teaching agricultural and technical skills. He believes that the key to Black success would come from learning job skills that would allow Blacks to earn money for themselves. 

Learning about these two men, I always leaned in favor of Du Bois' ideas. To me, Du Bois' plan was more long-term, while Washington's plan seemed temporary. Sure, vocational skills can get you a job, but how can you ever expect to get a better job in the future without an education? I also read about the so-called Atlanta Compromise, and that really turned me off from Booker T. Washington for good. It always seemed to me that Washington was a bit of an Uncle Tom, appeasing to the fears of whites by assuring them that Blacks would never be their equal as long as white philanthropists supported and funded his industrial efforts. 

The Unwritten Rules of the Men's Restroom (Written Down)

by J. Brown

Life is all about rules. When you were growing up, there were rules at school. Then when you got home, your parents had their own rules, too. You dreamed of the day when you would be an adult and rid yourself of these pesky limitations. But alas, you grew up and realized that adulthood has even more rules than childhood. Rules like "Pay your bills", "Stop at red lights" and "Don't punch other humans in the face" are really what define our lives. Without rules, everything is mayhem. Unbeknownst to some, even the most menial tasks in our lives require rules. Going to the bathroom is one such task. I don't know the rules to the ladies' room, because I don't go in there. However, the following rules are those that should be applied in the men's bathroom. Take heed, or be judged accordingly.

1. The Buffer Urinal Rule

The urinal was designed to appease the lazy desires of men everywhere. It allows men to use the toilet without having to unbuckle or unbutton a thing. You just unzip, flip, whizz, and dip. The only issue with urinals is that they don't exactly allow for the same type of privacy that you would get in a stall. What you end up with is a room full of men pulling their manhood out of their pants and peeing at a wall. This can be awkward. To quell the discomfort, the Buffer Urinal Rule states that when another man has occupied a urinal, the urinal that you use must be at least two spaces away from him, creating a one-urinal buffer zone. If we're going to be standing in the same room holding our privates, we don't need to be standing right next to each other. Some smaller bathrooms only have two urinals; the second one is simply a decoration. If one is occupied, you go and pee in the stall. Another caveat to this rule is that when you're in a larger bathroom with 10 or more urinals, you should always choose the ones furthest away from the entrance. Don't force everyone who enters to walk right past you. Caring is not sharing.

Nightman: The Podcast - Episode 8

"Power Hour"

Cast: J. Brown, Andrene, B. Cole

For this episode, we decided to do a power hour while recording the podcast, and the results were magical. While pounding beers and ciders, we discuss the story arcs and character developments in "Orange is the New Black", breaking girl code, the GOP Presidential debate, and the problematic viewpoints of one Ben Carson. 

We also talk about smegma. Yes, smegma.

Work vs. Real Life: Which You are You?

by J. Brown

Earlier this week, a coworker said something to me that's bothered me all week long. We were debating whether or not I owed it to her to be more talkative at work, despite the fact that our actual work requires very little interaction with one another. In defending her argument that we should interact more consistently, she said, "I spend more time with you than I do with my own family."

Wow.

The sad part about it is, she's absolutely right. During my four-year stint as a teacher, I would often point out that my students spent more time with me than they did with their actual parents. What I failed to realize was that I was simultaneously spending more time with them than I was with any of my family or friends. In fact, most of us probably spend more time at work or doing work than we spend doing anything else. Something seems wrong about that equation, but I'm not sure any of us really know how to fix it. 

I've always tried to maintain a separation between my work self and my real self. As a teacher, I was able to delineate a clear separation between "Joel" from "Mr. Brown". (Trust and believe, these were two decidedly different people.) Even now, working an office job, I like to think that I save some parts of my true personality for outside of work. My belief has always been that the workplace is for work, and I can enjoy my actual life after I clock out. More and more, though, I'm wondering how feasible that actually is.

Relationships 101: A How-To Guide for the Young Professional

by J. Brown

Omari and his wife, Charity

Episode 7 of the podcast featured a group of young, single professionals who shared their perspectives on modern dating for the 20- or 30-something. To look at things from the other end of the spectrum, I interviewed various friends of mine who have actually been able to maintain long-term relationships. Considering today's dating climate, they are the outliers, the chosen few who have managed to crack the proverbial code. To gain some knowledge on how they were able to make their relationships work, I asked them all the same set of questions and recorded their responses. Featured below are the responses of Aaron, 28; Wendy, 31; Omari, 27; Kim, 27; Brandon, 28; Trey, 24; Joele, 29; and Michael, 30. Pay attention and try to learn something.

1.) How did you and your significant other meet? 

Kim: My boyfriend and I met through a mutual friend. We were both invited to a free event and met each other on the line. We did the basic introductions and we didn't pay much attention to each other. I thought he was attractive, but nothing more. Eventually the group began discussing the NBA and we debated quite heatedly about the league. We kind of started to click from there. We went inside, drank quite a bit, danced together a lot, and the rest is history. 

Aaron: We briefly worked together and then found out that we both attended the same college, which was a nice ice breaker.  

Michael: The first time I met my now wife was in 2005 at the University of Miami, Pearson Residential College; it was during either Hurricane Katrina or Rita, I don't recall specifically. The dorms on campus were locked down for student safety, and to cull the inevitable cabin fever, the residences threw "Hurricane Parties". Skipping over some embarrassing details, I made my way into the party for the second time that night, fresh off a defeat (I should've lied when asked if I was a football player; big black guy, I could've pulled it off). Then, I met my wife. I'd like to say it was love at first sight, but I'm neither naive or romantic enough to believe in such concepts; lust at first sight is probably more applicable. We danced, we kissed, we visited my dorm room, we did NOT have coitus, and thus we were acquainted. 

Wendy: We went to middle school together.

Brandon: My significant other and I met on Tinder. Kind of crazy what a swipe right will do. 

Nightman: The Podcast - Episode 7

"Modern Dating 101"

Cast: J.Brown, Rae Ruckus, Andrene & Princess

For this episode, I'm joined by a panel of young, single professionals to explore the nuances of modern dating. They share where potential partners can be found, explain what makes dating difficult, and describe their own methods for navigating the singles scene.

Our Obsession with Opinion

by J. Brown

We're obsessed with ourselves.

That's what previous generations thinks of us, and for the most part, they're probably right. My generation (Generation Y/ the Millenials/ whatever CNN uses to refer to us) is pretty vain. We created the selfie, the status update, and the Foursquare check-in. We've not only mastered the overshare, we've made it popular.

Most would look at this as simply a sign of the times, but I know better. I get that the generations before us might not have had Internet, but they weren't taking pictures of themselves with their Polaroids, either. They might not have had cell phones, but they didn't feel the need to outline their weekend and bore you with tedious details the following Monday. People have always had opinions, but they didn't always feel the need to share them. But those were simpler times. As technology became more complex, so too did our vanity. 

My generation's self-centeredness is perhaps best characterized by our infatuation with opinions. Over the past few years, it seems like the line between fact and opinion has become blurrier than it's ever been. You can't just be against gay marriage; it should be outlawed. You can't simply disagree with conservatives; they're bigots and should all be banned from Congress. You can't just be upset that Kendrick Lamar lost a Grammy to Macklemore; the entire Grammy academy must be racist. We as a generation have become quite fond of not only portraying our opinions as the right way of thinking, but actually getting upset with people for disagreeing with us.

Nightman: The Podcast - Episode 6

"The Dolezal Quandary"

Cast: J.Brown, B.Cole


It's been a long time. We shouldn't have left you.

For Episode 6, we get into the topic that's been flooding everyone's newsfeed and timeline: Rachel Dolezal's blackness. We discuss her interview with Matt Lauer from this morning and the implications of her comments.

We also touch on the NBA Finals and whether or not LeBron should win the MVP if his team loses.